NEVER JET HOT

Combines bartender and psychiatrist jokes... Guy telling his bartender his troubles; "My wife thinks she's a pretzel!" Bartender sez, "Did you take her to a psychiatrist?" "Yeah... he says she's twisted." OR "My wife thinks she's a piano!" Bartender sez, "Did you take her to a psychiatrist?" "Are you kidding? Do you know how much it costs to move a piano??"

I am slowly but surely losing it. The latest mental faculty that seems to be deteriorating is the ability to quickly assess the context of what I am reading. For instance, my local paper had this headline; Man wanted for peeping into dressing rooms ...and my first thought was, I wonder how much it pays?

Jokesgalore.com keeps sending my these psychiatrist jokes. They are making dream about the old Twin Teepees restaurant in Seattle. (I do that when I get too tense.) Patient: "Doctor, sometimes I feel like I'm invisible." Psychiatrist: "What!...who said that?"

Ya gotta help me, Doc; I'm completely obsessed with psychiatrist jokes. Even if they're not funny! Patient: Doctor, I have a split personality. Psychiatrist: Nurse, bring in another chair!

We all know that there are only so many actual jokes in the world, and all the others are just variations of same. I categorize this one in the group "Doc, I think I'm a" (AKA Doc my wife thinks she's a..) or just "Psychiatrist Jokes"... Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a curtain. Psychiatrist: Pull yourself together!