NEVER JET HOT

hehehe Funny Classified Ads

"John & Marsha decided that the only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with their 8 year old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony and tell him to report on all the neighborhood activities. He began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation. 'There's a car being towed from the parking lot' he shouted. A few moments passed 'An ambulance just drove by' A few moments passed. 'Looks like the Andersons have company' he called out. 'Matt's riding a new bike' 'The Coopers are having sex!!' Startled, Mother and Dad shot up in bed!!! Dad cautiously asked 'How do you know they are having sex??' 'Jimmy Cooper is standing out on his balcony too'"

I like this foob. Can't help myself. He even manages to sort of define the word foob. The Comics Curmudgeon

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life? Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions: If: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26. Then: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98% and K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96% But, A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100% And, B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103% AND, look how far ass kissing will take you. A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118% So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and Knowledge will get...

OK. I give up. What happened here? Spamusement! Poorly-drawn cartoons inspired by actual spam subject lines!

The scary thing is, I think they are serious. Come on, it's bad enough I have to brush the dog's teeth. Dog Condoms - Canine Birth Control

I have been trying and trying and trying and TRYING to get the pulley on my new power steering pump so we can use our Ford Exploder again, to no avail. While scouring the internet for a magical fix, I ran across this guy's tale of woe, involving buying wrecked Isuzus and investing enough time and money in one to probably buy a new Toyota, but that wouldn't satisify his grease-lust I guess. In the last picture on the bottom, it appears the evil vehicle has swallowed his son whole, leaving nothing but shoes and socks. Scary! Chevy V-6 Engine Swap

Street Lights and dog poop; banes of modern society. WFTV.com - News Of The Strange - Psychologist Going To Jail For Committing Neighbor Over Poop Fued

They need to bring the Gong Show back, just for this guy. Flash � Numa Numa

If I was going back to a simpler place and time, this might be a part of that. Although, I wonder why the parking lot is chock full. Maybe fishing just opened and they are getting bait and beer. But that would entail pickup trucks. And what's with all the Chevys? It's making the little Rambler so nervous, she can't get out of 2nd gear.

THIS JUST IN.... It's official... TheRestlessMouse.com has "dumped" eBaY. While it was a fun community and a great marketing tool in it's heyday, the cost of doing business there, combined with the additional time it takes (usually 2 to 4 emails back and forth on each transaction, plus "feedback") -Well, it's just not worth it anymore. We had been considering the money lost on the average ebay sale to be a marketing expense, but we are going to take that time and money and use it to make your experience shopping on our website even more freaking delightful than it already was. You will barely be able to contain your joy.